Saturday, July 26, 2008

Settling down to the routine

It's been a few days since I last blogged. Kept busy with activities previously considered mundane but now appreciated as chores that make me feel normal. Continue to comb the city for healthy food as my appetite returns to normal. Today am hosting a small tea party for some friends who have to declare perfect state of health before joining. Looking forward to it as it is the first serious encounter of the personal kind in more than a month.

The series of booster jabs to build up my white cells has ended with minimal side-effects save for some back muscle aches on the 3rd day.

Spirit is up and staying positive. The next treatment starts coming Thurs. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Sunnybunny

Monday, July 21, 2008

Reinforcement called upon

Had my first blood test today to determine if my white blood cell count is low enough to require a booster shot. Result was as expected and the first booster injection was administered. It will be followed by another 3 to be spaced out over the week. My body needs these reinforcement to wage successful war against potential virus attackers and to rebuild immunity after recent toxic invasion.

Dr Khoo, my oncologist, was satisfied with my progress and ability to handle side effects of the chemo injections and has assured that the next round would be similar in dose and body response. What a relief!

My body seems to be getting back to normal. Appetite has returned, nausea has taken a back seat and tiredness is much reduced. Now I need to nap only once a day. So far, no mouth ulcers too!

Increasingly, boredom should be setting in as I mope around the house for lengths of time to which I'm unaccustomed. But then I remind myself that soon I'll be adjusting to the 2nd cycle of injections all over again.

Sunnybunny

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

A funny thing happened on the way to the clinic

The last thing I expect at a time like this is to appear on some MediaCorp CNA programme on breast cancer, sans face. The real star of course is my breast surgeon, Dr Wee Siew Bock. I'm there as part of the props. In fact only my hand and lip movements while in consultation were shot. So much for my matching bandana and outfit.

It all started with the clinic asking if I mind being filmed during the consultation. I thought if this is my way of contributing to the enlightenment of all females potentially at risk, why not. What could have been a 20-min check-up lasted more than an hour after several takes of the same shot. By the end of it all both doctor and I felt exhausted having to repeat the questions and answers to get that perfect shot. We even thought of talking about the weather just to stretch time. Well it finally ended with both of us agreeing that we cannot make a serious living in front of cameras.

The Hollywood trip aside, the side-effects of nausea have subsided significantly although they do have a mysterious way of revisiting when least expected. Appetite is returning although portions still meagre.

Planning to go for my first walk later this evening to check on neighbours' garden plants and irritate their dogs.

sunnybunny

Sunday, July 13, 2008

One down, five to go

Yesterday was my 3rd and last injection for the first cycle. The cumulative effects of the chemicals are finally setting in. I experienced fatigue with a capital F. Nausea was not far away although, thankfully, I managed to hold on to what I ate. These days, side effects management is so advanced. I had anti-nausea drip and given pills before treatment. The first and foremost priority is still to keep myself hydrated. Can't wait to see the side effect go..

Haven't worn my wigs yet. One is indeed funky as my hair stylist thought it so 'me'. I look like I'm on the Cats musical set. The other is bit more sedate although it has the nice ash gray highlight. Have to look my age now.

There's enough caps, scarves, bandanas, beanies to keep me co-ordinated sartorially in the meantime.

My 3-week cycle works this way : 1st week of fatigue, 2nd week of low immuno and 3rd week of recovery. It is in the last week that I 'm up to visitors.

Audio books are such great inventions. Whenever I'm kept awake in between my pee breaks, I tune in to Peter Mayle's Provence adventures which are delightful description of how an English couple who set up home in Provence, France encountered cross-cultural situations from interaction with neighbours. It was recommended by a friend who went through similar recuperation needs.

Must turn in early again. Feeling fatigued already.

sunnybunny

Friday, July 11, 2008

2nd day went well

The 2nd day went by without a hitch although the effects are snowballing. Napped a lot more and nausea still lingering although thankfully did not throw up. The 3-week cycle is marked as such : tiredness in 1st week, low immuno in 2nd and recovery in 3rd which means that getting together with friends should take place once every 3 weeks.

Dutifully taking my quota of fruit juice, cooling herbal teas to drive the 'heatiness' away. Touch wood no signs of mouth ulcers. Have to continue with discipline to stick to soft, clean tasting and avoid fried or grilled foods. I must say it's tough for a foodie like me.

Encouragement, support and advice for which I'm really grateful continue to pour in.

Turning in early tonight.
Sunnybunny

Thursday, July 10, 2008

It has finally started!

My first day of treatment. The nurse was wonderfully patient and caring. She explained as the process continues, reaffirmed the many tips and advice relating to body reaction, food, rest and relaxation. It wasn't as bad or frightful as I expected. In fact it seemed like a prolonged saline injection.

Met a Uni friend at the clinic. His sister has 3rd stage stomach cancer and already had 3 chemo treatments to shrink the tumor before surgery. Her prognosis was good as her oncologist said that the tumor has shrunk considerably such that she could go for an operation to remove it. Very comforting indeed.

The medication took effect quickly and true to Dr Khoo's expectations I felt tired and had a good nap after I returned home. Feelings of nausea were dealt with by deep breathing exercises. Thinking back cannot help but feel that my 5 years of yoga breathing exercises were preparation for this eventuality.

Had a light meal of fish porridge which was fully retained. Very satisfied with the tentative progress I'm making. Tomorrow is another day and am curious to know what challenges lie ahead for my body.

Sunnybunny

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

A brand new experience

I shaved my head today in preparation for tomorrow. Having worn my hair in various styles all through my life, seeing them fall as the shaver mowed through the locks was an experience I find unforgettable. In a way I felt more relieved that I'm seeing them go in their healthy state than to find them dull and lifeless on my pillow - a sight that will surely greet me into the first week or so of chemo. Vicariously I could feel how an NS recruit or a nun would have felt - an act of staying away from the familiar and embarking on a new chapter in one's life.

I came home to my younger son's eagerness to give his feedback on what would look hip on me. Very useful tips he gave on the wigs, bandanas and beanies. He's accompanying me to the chemo tomorrow and he could just put on his headgear as show of support.

My hair stylist said that the shape of my head is round and I must say that as I look into the mirror, I can accept how I look now and with some creativity, style whatever 'cranial prothesis' (medical term for wigs to claim for insurance purposes) to suit the occasion. I might even go 'au naturel'. I think I have the self confidence to do so.

Sunnybunny

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Rest day

Yesterday was a red letter day. I received my GCIA Certificate from the Dean of NUS Law Faculty in a simple and short ceremony witnessed by family members. I'm now a newly minted International Arbitrator. At brunch with them at Eden Santuary at Rochester Park, I felt at peace with the world, dining amidst green surroundings and tucking into healthy fare. I hope they will frequent it as much as I intend to.

The chemo day is nearing and what's left to be done over the next few days must be completed as I finally start my battle with the new 'invaders'. More clarity from friends and oncologist on what to expect in terms of side effects and how to overcome them are all so comforting.

Today is a day of rest which I define not as simply 'doing nothing' and lazing around. It is one filled with a touch of excitement as I meet for the first time my future in-laws over lunch. A bit of meditation in the afternoon capped in the evening with a concert to soothe my soul.

SunnyBunny

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Productive day

Running errands to ensure as much preparation as possible for the big day. Got 2 funky wigs and left them with my trusty hair stylist to trim and colour to fit my looks and personality. Got even more bandanas and beanie caps to suit my mood and wardrobe. Even went to office and had a chat with my boss to make arrangements working from home during chemo treatment. Had my IT help fixing the Bloomberg connection to my Blackberry.

My lunch partner gave useful tips. No going out to avoid germs, that fatal sneeze in a crowded lift. Sweating is a far better means of getting toxins out of the body than urinating. Hence, exercises during treatment is highly recommended. Audio books from the library is advisable since reading can be straining after awhile. Must make a list of what to borrow to pass time during chemo.

Quite perversely, am looking forward to the coming ordeal.

Sunnybunny

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Decision day

Today is an important day. Finally came to terms with my decision to proceed with chemotherapy. My trust in my oncologist, medical advances and above all, the lack of a choice if I want to reduce the odds of recurrence from one in two to one in five are all essential drivers.

Much has been done to prepare myself mentally for the eventual side-effects of the treatment. Strange as it may sound, I'm actually looking forward to the challenge of ensuring that life in every aspect should be as normal as possible. Knowing the concoctions of ABC organic and wheat grass juice, shaven head, real hair wig styled and coloured to my liking are just some of the preparations for this rough ride.

Well-meaning friends and survivors have told of success stories and experiences of the fight with this nasty cell. Mine is stage 2, still considered early and for which treatment stands a good chance of succcess.

On Thursday next, my first sparring with the enemy will begin. Until then, I'm getting ready for a good fight. Lots of rest, mental and physical preparation and yoga. Family support has been great.

Sunnybunny